I wish someone had told me how much hard, dirty, ass-kicking work this was going to be.
Not the blog writing, that I had an inkling of, but the witchcraft itself.
This turning of the wheel I’m focusing more on myself, digging in deep where the wicked things lay and slaying my demons. Some days its all I can do to hold the sword aloft.
Some days I cant even raise the sword and Im kicking and punching and biting for air.
Wrestling with the ick and ook that I thought I had laid to rest years ago, pain bubbling and oozing to the surface, lashing out at The Boyfriend and the rest of humanity for unknowingly prodding old wounds.
Many of my friends, loved ones and the general population love this old Cherokee saying about two wolves. One of my friends had it in her bathroom for a long while. Maybe you know it, maybe you don’t. It goes something like this:
“An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.
“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” He continued, “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”
The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”
The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”
With all due respect, I humbly dissent. We all have our shadow, have our light. But starving one will not make the other shine the more brightly, it’ll kill it as well. They are two halves of the same whole and each deserves our respect. I suggest feeding each one until they gorge, learning every single inch of their bodies. Know thyself. Know the darkest desires of our hearts. For how else can we truly be enlightened?
The moral of the story should be that you allow neither wolf to rule you. That you accept emotions of all kind , but not allow them to overcome your Will. Hold the reins for both of the wolves and care for each.